not_an_xman: (I ask burning questions too)
Age: ?? SEKRIT
Birthday: Also sekrit.
Height: 188 cm (6' 2")
Weight: 210 lbs
Eyes: Brown
Hair: Bald
Medical Info: Has cancer. The type of cancer is not named but going by his APPEARANCE I'd say it is skin cancer. To survive cancer he volunteered for an experiment, basically infused a healing factor taken from Wolverine. For a long time this meant that he could lose a limb and have it back in a few minutes. Lately it's a lot more subdued because, as the writers put it, that's kind of ridiculous. So Deadpool can still regenerate practically anything, it'll take him a while. But this does mean that he is technically immortal. He's died...twice before I think, though. Also, currently has some sort of techno-organic virus thing in him as he shares DNA with Cable now.
Physical traits: [pasted from marveldatabase] Psychic Immunity: The healing factor causes his brain cells to be in a constant state of flux and regeneration, rendering him immune to psychics such as Professor X and Emma Frost.
Superhuman Strength: enhanced to levels that are beyond the natural limits of the human body.
Superhuman Stamina: Deadpool's musculature generates considerably less fatigue toxins than the muscles of an ordinary human being, granting him superhuman levels of stamina in all physical activities.
Enhanced Agility: superior to those of even the finest human athlete.
Enhanced Reflexes: superior to those of even the finest human athlete.
Poison Immunity
Drug Immunity: immune to most drugs
Enhanced Drug Resistance
Enhanced Longevity: posssesses an extended lifespan
Immortal: Deadpool has actually met and established a relationship with the personification of Death in the Marvel universe and as a result has been cursed by T-Ray, at the behest of Thanos to be unable to die.

Also note, that due to Deadpool's cancer, his skin is horribly disfigured all around his body, and he is quite ugly without his mask/costume.
Abilities: Deadpool is an extraordinary hand-to-hand combatant and is skilled in multiple unarmed combat techniques. He is a master of assassination techniques, is an excellent marksman, and is highly skilled with bladed weapons (frequently carrying two swords strapped to his back). He is fluent in Japanese, German, Spanish, amongst other languages. Deadpool can lift about 2 tons.
Note for the Psychics: As mentioned earlier, he's basicaly immune to psychics, although they could read his surface thoughts. This is an unconscious immunity on Deadpool's part and doesn't go away at any time.
What's okay to mention around him: Deadpool breaks the fourth wall himself, you could tell him anything you want and it won't phase him.
Can I shapeshift/bodyswap/spit at/step on/etc?: Yes.
Maim/Murder/Death: Sure. Even his best friends shoot him in the head when they want him knocked out for a few minutes. (Seriously you have to try to kill him to shut him up, and then basically succeed)
Cooking: Does Taco Bell count? He takes missions so he'd never have to cook.
Kissing/Hugging: Uh, if you want.  He won't complain.  Unless you're a guy.  Then he'll complain loudly and try to prove to you he's straight.  Very defensive about it :P
not_an_xman: (coffee filter)
Your Name/Alias: Comic
Age: 20
Character: Deadpool AKA Wade T. Wilson AKA The Merc With A Mouth
Series: Deadpool, Cable & Deadpool, arguably Agent X as well.
Character Age: Not revealed. Sekrit like Wolverine.
Job: Camp Psychologist
Canon: Hi, I'm Wade Wilson, better known as Deadpool the Merc with a- oh, I'm too early? Okay. I'll just be over there.

Canon: Wade Wilson is a mercenary for hire, with amazing strength, agility, skill, and a regeneration factor that was literally copied from
Wolverine. However most of his opponents would agree that his biggest weapon is his mouth, and the fact that no matter what you do,
he will NOT SHUT UP. He continues to wise crack and taunt enemies through any sort of situation.

Until recently, Wade was literally insane. Nobody really noticed his recovery, though.

Deadpool cares not for your fourth wall, making references to things outside of his own canon, things he couldn't possibly know about.

Notes: Bea Arthur is one of the Golden Girls, the freakishly tall one. His obsession with her is never really explained. And that sheer
amount of bold and italic is also canon.


Sample Post:
AHHHHH!

AHHHHH!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Man, I love screaming. Nothin' else gives your vocal cords the extensive workout. It's like a gym for your voice!

Anyway, I'm Wade Wilson, also known as Deadpool, the Merc with a Mouth! I was told I get to break all
kind of fourth wall boundaries because this is an app, and not a post! We'll have fun, I promise! And nobody will have
to take it in the butt! Unless of course, you want to!

I just got briefed on this place and let me tell you I'm impressed, but disappointed it took you so long to see that
one thing you lacked was a genuine Grade A Deadpool. I mean, you can have your choice of anyone in the multiverse if
I understand correctly, but not me? Along the same note, not Bea? Who better to snark at your kids than the geriatric woman who has stolen my heart?

Oh, I got distracted. Where was I- right! The job. So Kitty, I can call you Kitty right? No? I'll take that as
as yes, madame Director. You know you love it. Anyway, Kitty, how much does this gig pay? I'm not goin' to go in
and babysit kids out of the goodness of my own heart y'know. A money order! That's what I'm talking about. That's a lot
of zeros! Oh me oh my- It feels like Chrismas in July! I'm a poet and didn't know it! With this kind of moolah, I can finally
afford those breast implants I've always wanted! I'll be the dame of the mercenary world-- they'll call me Lady Deadpool,
the Merc with gazoongas! Or in England--capital knockers.

I guess I'll have to introduce myself to the snot-nosed brats soon- so I better practice. Tell me what you think.
I'm trying to be 'down with it', y'know? Make the kids think I'm 'on the level' and 'keepin it real'. "Hey kids!
It's me, your friendly neighborhood Deadpool here, with an announcement! I'm going to be one of your Camp Psychologists
for a while, yo! That means if you're kickin it freestyle and want a bit o' honey? You come see me and we'll work
somethin' out."

What d'you think? Pretty impressive or too 'funky fresh'? I managed to get my point across and not ONCE
mentioned the zombies, gorillas, and toucans! Will the toucans lead me to a pot of froot loops? No, that was leprechauns. Arr,
after me lucky charms are ye? Dey be down in Davy Jones locker they be!  Arrr! Avast! Avast ye!
Sure, I could've listed stuff like
how you have your own personal Canada (mounties! I'll love them and hug them and kick them forever!), that those
nubile Young Avengers are around (I have a weak spot for how ripped Hulkling is), but I won't, because then the app
will be all disjointed and feel like I'm reading off a list! And not even a numbered list! I do love my numbered lists.

If you still have any doubts about me, Kitty, you could always call one of my references! The ones that aren't dead at
least, funny how common that is
, and they'll tell you what they tell me! "Oh Deadpool, you always remind me how
much worse off I could be. If only you were around three weeks ago I could've saved on therapy.
" It's enough
to make you feel warm and fuzzy inside!

So, to end this app on a funny note (that's what people usually like right? I've never been apped before.) I'll let you guys
in on the secret to my success.  It's the Deadpool 10 Steps to Sanity program! Usually I only reveal the first eight
steps, but you'll get the whole shebang!

1. Step One: Drink from the far side of a cup.
2. Step Two: Buckle your shoe.
3. Step Three and Four: Knock at the door.
4. Step Five and Six: Pick up chicks.
5. Step Seven and Eight: Lay them straight. (If you know what I mean!)
6. Step Nine: ???
7. Step Ten: Profit!

Of course, by the time anyone ever gets to those last two steps I've already taken their money and they have
some sort of STD. But oh, that's the price you pay to stay sane! It works for me! So leave it to- oh, we've run
out of space? But I haven't even told you about the time I killed the Messiah! Hey, what are you doing with that syringe?

Ooh, pretty polls.

In!
[---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------] 59 (96.7%)
Out!
[--------------] 2 (3.3%)

Profile

not_an_xman: (Default)
Deadpool - Wade T. Wilson

July 2010

S M T W T F S
    123
45678910
1112131415 1617
181920212223 24
25262728293031

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags
Page generated Jun. 6th, 2025 01:23 pm
Powered by Dreamwidth Studios